Account - HER – Ability

Is It Just ME, or do you, too have a short fuse for certain things – like bullying?

I have just read a story about a young woman in her early 20s who jumped to her death from the George Washington Bridge in New York.

A student of fashion, she aspired to do great things; as we all should.  She left behind grieving parents and other family members who may never understand what led her to her final moment - or their possible role in it.

She also left behind a list of 5 other young woman who, from the ice cold water of the Hudson River she would ever deny  a place in her death that they did not have in her life; they are to be denied attendance at her services.

I am not mentioning her name; she has many.

For as long as I can remember, I have had a strong and negative reaction to anyone who bullies.  I have stood up against them – boys and girl – when I witnessed their pathetic attempt to appear bigger or better than another.
 
In my generation, it seemed we tolerated or expected such behavior from boys – but girls?  As time has moved on, (but not necessarily progressed) I think the “fair” among us have grown less so (and in every way) than once imaginable.  WHY?

In our quest for equality did we knowingly choose to surrender all that positively differentiated us from the primal instincts of our male counterparts; or was that the spoils of the battle we fought?  In either case, may we have a mulligan?

Though bullying has been around forever, the debate about it is new and hardly ready to be called – if ever it will.  So why does it seem to be breeding at warp speed?  Media?  I would say yes.

Women have been pitted against other women in “reality” shows under the banner of, i.e., “The REAL Housewives of…”  Jealousy, greed, gossip are standards by which air time is “rewarded”.  Networks are making millions in the new arena of femme-fatale gladiators in which women are both the victim AND the prey.  To that I say “BRAVO” (reference intended: The Bravo Network!)  You make women bullying other women look to be a goal every self-worshiping female should set her sights on.  Again, I say “BRAVO”!  (Shame on you!)

If anyone feels they are made big in making others feel small, I have news for them: they are the lowest of the low.  Their lack of self-worth may one day catch up with them and they will reap what you have sown; or perhaps, their children will – how sad.

I feel myself winding-up here because I have an instinctive, visceral reaction to the whole topic of bullying.  I WANT NAMES!!

So to the beautiful young woman, who chose to leap to her death this week, was this your attempt to bully-back?  Was this the only way you could control the situation?  Do you think you have left a handful of colleagues behind who you eternal control over through guilt, remorse, sorrow?

OR HAS THE BULLY WON?  Has the bully proved her point that you were of lesser value?

HAS ANYONE WON?

Of course not…we have all lost and will continue to do so until we realize we are each self-empowering.  Another can only take from us what we are willing to surrender.  DO NOT.

Find a Mentor.  Be a Mentor.  Be there for your children, for each other.  Be a champion in the cause against bullying and to you, I say, “BRAVA”.

So, IS it just me, or are you, too, ready to stand beside others and tell them just how wonderful, how worthy they are.

                                                    SO ARE YOU!